YOU got defeated, although this war was imposed on me by you without
my consent. I don't believe in the terms like 'defeat' and 'victory'
however the struggle by you tells me that it was your true defeat that
forced you to adopt adverse methods for becoming victor by the hook or
the crook on my brain and my persona.
Who are 'YOU'? I don't know the real identity of YOU. I just know that
a series of happenings began against me in 1999 in which I was left
with no other option to resign from Opinion Pages of Daily Ibrat,
Hyderabad (Sindh) and ended up on my forced departure from Pakistan.
Yes, at that time it was Pakistan.
I was persecuted in Nepal, and I am still being persecuted in India.
Three years of extensive persecution outside Pakistan. And, thirteen
years of the worst episodes and nightmares of persecution by Pakistani
armed forces in Pakistan.
YOU couldn't resist me from doing better for my people. Neither in
yesteryears, nor today!
YOU tried to confuse me. YOU are many. When some of my Westerner and
Asian friends are questioned, I am pushed to think that YOU are not
Pakistan alone, YOU are also its allies. When the renown citizens of
the world powers are asked something concerning me, it confirms that
YOU are many. And, yet you have chosen to attempt again and again to
defeat me, to exhaust, humiliate, disturb, and to downgrade me. But I
am here. The very this place. Fighting through my pen. I may be a
little tired. I am not exhausted at all. I can give fight for a
century as an individual.
You tried your worst. And, I tried my best in the favor of my people.
You wanted to kill me in Pakistan, you couldn't. When you resisted me
in Pakistan from raising voice and standing by my people, you
couldn't. Finally, you chose to tint my image at that time; you gave a
full blow to defeat me on ethical grounds; fortunately you couldn't
succeed. You tried to do the same in Nepal. You tried your best that
UNHCR should not issue me refugee recognition. You failed. You did
even worst when you managed my return back to Pakistan against my will
and said me there that "Here is your Karachi, now take hold of it.
Here are your people, take hold of them. Here is Sindh and start your
rights activism." Again, you wanted me to become your instrument. I
You wanted me to adopt anti-Urdu speaking line. I adopted anti-divison
of Sindh line; and yet I kept on considering Urdu speaking community
as new Sindhi. You sent me a message that it is intelligence mechanism
of Sindh that is against you, and Punjab is favoring you; I understood
the actuality of the game.
How I could have forgotten your message delivered through Mohammad
Waseem of Indus Resource Centre (IRC) that Pakistani establishment
would take one year to completely destroy me. How I could have
forgotten the words by Mohammad Tahseen of South Asia Partnership
Pakistan, "You are Zulfiqar Shah. Wherever you will go, they will
chase you up." I still remember when once he said that you are
probably the only one in the civil society of Pakistan who has given
conclusive shape to one's own social movements initiatives. And, yet I
cannot forget how I was kept on chemical compounds in 2007 when I was
still part of SAP - Sindh Office. I cannot forget how we were given
poisonous compounds in Lahore that our hair and nails were being
broken and were getting de-graded. I was feeling Cardiac pain.
How I can forget that while in Kathmandu I sent an article to a Mumbai
based journal, and I received a call from Mohammad Waseem who said
that you should exclude some data from the article or withdraw the
article and instead should write an article on the eighteenth
constitutional amendment. I still remember when he said that write an
article suggesting Sindhi people not to observe strikes and active
agitation against Sindh Local Government Ordinance. I refused.
Karamat Ali and his friends misguided Kanak Mani Dixit against me.
And, when Karamat came Kathmandu and asked Kanak to manage a talk
between himself and me on the local government issue, I simply
I still remember, at least two weeks before I was poisoned in
Kathamndu, Mohammad Tahseen sent me a text message while he was also
in the city, "Zulfi, now Kathmandu will take well care of you!" And, I
understood that the worst has to come as yet.
When I went to the Ministry of Education, Nepal to seek permission for
the studies, Pakistan Embassy officials came there on the day I had to
collect the permission, and said to an official that if he is saying
he is a Pakistani, give him the document. Thanks to the official who
said that we have already issued him the permission. And, the very
same happened in India. I submitted Long Term Visa (LTV) application.
An official said why in India you are introducing yourself as Sindhi?
You have to accept Pakistani identity. I refused.
The worst of all is your attempt to victimize my families, relatives,
office employees (especially ISM, and no doubt SAP Sindh Office as
CIRCUS AND THEATRE DEMORALIZATION
Although YOU tried your best to resist my medical treatment in Delhi.
It was shocking to me when I was told by an AIMS doctor that had you
not written against Pakistan, you would not have faced this. He also
said that I was so young to write that much open, bold and hard. I
understood that you had problem with my write-ups, and you still have
And, when I was taken to Rohni after my protest at sit-in at Jantar
Mantar, and I started writing on certain issues, you did again the
worst. You unleashed uninvited sexual advancements if not persecution,
you started humiliating my family. When I wrote following articles,
all of these were earlier resisted from getting published, and later
on when these published, you unleashed worst of the torture.
I moved from there to another place but again you made dirty tricks.
A fleet of persons kept on hovering around me in Delhi, abusing me and
my family. You took almost all names of my family members, friends,
and colleagues. You took the honorable names of the relatives, my
sisters, mother, in-laws, cousins, uncles, aunts, distant relatives,
wives, daughters and sisters of friends; the Indian lady journalists
and civil society activists whom I had acquaintance. You said that you
have slept with them.
You also left a fleet of persons around my place of stay, who round
the clock were repeating the same. You wanted me to utter YES for all
you wanted to write. You were not concerned with the truth. You were
concerned about the dominance of your untruth.
You just wanted to destroy my integrity, emotions, thoughts, and image
because you managed through gadgets that I should think on the line
whatsoever you want, and how ugly they may be. You wanted me to feel
about it, and to imagine about it. You arranged the live telecast of
my bedroom and my travels in Delhi to so many. When you find nothing
'disastrous' through the brain reading, you kept on giving me chemical
compounds and wanted me to recall memories. When nothing according to
your wish was found, you wanted me to say Yes again through the
mechanism which involves chemical compounds and make someone
depressant enough to repeat like a parrot whatever sentence you say.
And for that purpose, you made a blend of chemical compounds, theatre,
and use of laser technology.
What you could do, was only that I just started thinking about it for
a few seconds after your months long circus and theatre, and again
brushed these aside. I know you wanted to damage my image, and wanted
to demoralize me and resist my thinking process.
You failed because you did impositions in the name of open-up process.
And, you couldn't succeed.
You tried to tint the image of my family members, and some of the
civil society activists and journalists from India, Sindh, few from
Pakistani Punjab, and Nepal in my eyes. They will always have respect
from my side.
Here I am giving the links of the articles which lead you to do that
worst against me in India:
1. International Politics of Middle Path
2. Making of Twenty First Century State
3. State crimes by Pakistan: Is Sindh at the verge of secession?
4. Why Britain is responsible to the people of Sindh and Balochistan?
5 I realized if. I wore a Sindhi cap, I would be killed
WHY YOU FAILED
YOUR failure lies in the reality that I am an individual, and You are
'ESTALISHMENTS'. And, still you have fought against a person, who is
analyst, activist, and writer; who loves his nations and lands (Sindh
and Balochistan). You failed because you kept your identity hidden.
You failed because you said a couple of months ago, "You have to
bow-down because you believe in the freedom of Sindh." And, yet you
remained unsuccessful. I can never withdraw my belief in the freedom
as well as historical country-hood of Sindh and Balochistan.
I still remember you said me once through a lip-serving person, "We
are doing this against you hidden because we don't want an open
animosity with you." I still remember when you said again through a
lip-server, "We hate your name. We want you to change your name. We
want you to get converted to Hinduism." And, once a policeman told
another Officer in front of me that "We have heard that Shah has got
converted." I was startled. Religion is your business, and I hate your
business. Therefore, I hate your expression of religions.
I don't believe in the terms like 'victory' and 'failure'. Yet, I
believe in the permanence and persevence of the TRUTH. I believe that
as much as you do that, you will open-up your reality of brutality.
And again, I am of the firm resolve that those who were used against
me involuntary or through trap; those who were used against me through
misunderstanding and later-on realized; and those who intentionally
did this and later-on realized and withdrawn acting against me are not
culprits. The culprits are those, who kept on persecution
intentionally, through volunteer will, and still are not leaving that
I know about your might. You even managed someone probably from Indian
Army who wrote on my facebook that Pakistan was doing this
internationally to give you punish. You failed because this could not
develop any hatred in my heart against Indian Army, even nor against
the person because I was sure such acts only can be done by the ones
who are trapped.
Your failure is my being committed with Sindh and continuing writing for that.
(New Delhi, India)